"And who will care, who will chide you if you wander away from wherever you are
to look for your soul?”
― Mary Oliver
My Approach to Therapy
Let’s figure out if we’re a good fit.
To help you decide whether we might be an effective team, whether opening up to a stranger will be worth it, it’s important to know something about how I view therapy and how I practice.
First and foremost, if we work together, we’ll really be in it together—in the pain and confusion and overwhelm of your present circumstances and in the hope for relief, understanding, freedom, and clarity down the road.
I’ll listen, witness, question, advocate. I’ll challenge you to stretch and breathe. I’ll push when necessary, and encourage you to remain curious. And if you struggle to hold onto hope as we go, I can hold it for you until you can hold it for yourself.
I’ve been there. No therapist worth their salt is a stranger to being in the patient’s seat. My ongoing commitment to self-exploration and growth benefits all my relationships, and if we choose to collaborate, it will benefit you.
My approach can be broadly described as “psychodynamic” and is founded on the following cornerstones:
Curiosity
We all have an unconscious. I believe that there are forces operating inside us but outside of our awareness that impact how we experience the world, how we think, feel, react in our bodies, and relate to ourselves and others.
These forces often keep us stuck in self-limiting orbits, going around and around in whirlpools of pain.
Becoming curious about these stubborn patterns and more aware of their roots can free you up to make choices that lead to greater joy, meaning, passion, and fulfillment.
Compassion
Each of us is a complicated accumulation of a lifetime of experiences. It’s crucial to appreciate who you are today in the context of where you came from—your unique family, social and cultural history.
As we explore your origins, you may discover that your present struggles reflect your past and reveal old strategies that helped you cope at one time but no longer serve you.
Developing an appreciation for how you learned to survive early in life—even if it’s getting in your way now—allows you to let go of shame and frees you to move forward.
Challenge
Insight is vital but often not sufficient for growth. Lasting change requires us to stretch beyond the edge of our comfort zone and try out new ways of approaching life. Easier said than done.
When we stand at the edge of the unknown, on the brink of becoming someone new, we often hesitate and retreat into the safe ruts of who and how we’ve always been.
In those moments, I’ll be there to provide the extra push and encouragement you may need to stick with the stretch and breathe into your potential.
Connection
Paying attention to my relationship with each client is central to how I practice. I’ll always be curious to know what you’re feeling toward me and our work, and I’ll encourage you to tell me.
Not all therapists work this way, but I think it’s essential to building a strong partnership. It also helps us notice when your challenges outside therapy find their way into our relationship.
For example, if you are someone who doesn’t like depending on others, you may feel uncomfortable, at times, depending on me. Or if you tend to worry about how people perceive you, you might, at some point, be concerned about my opinion of you.
This can provide an invaluable real-time opportunity to address the very patterns that brought you to treatment in the first place.
A true feel for how we’ll work together can only come through time spent together.
Everyone is different. My approach is flexible enough to be shaped by each client’s unique challenges, background, needs, goals, and personality. I look forward to taking the time necessary for me to get to know you, for you to get to know me, and for us to learn how we can best work together.
